I never grew up in a yogic environment...
Call me the overachiever; a wildly driven girl always looking for my next adventure, my next competition, my next big challenge...
Since a very young age I tried real hard to present myself to the world as a nice, pretty package, with a bright big bow on the top. I strived towards perfection in almost every area of my life.
And how I treated my body was no exception.
I was fresh out of my first few months of University, where I was indulging in #allthefood when I came home for Thanksgiving I was lovingly told by my mother that I had developed some beautiful womanly curves.
Almost instantly preceding that comment, was a comment that my curves were not womanly and beautiful at all and that I was getting fatter.
Well, I guess I could have gone a little less heavy on those warm delicious chocolate chip cookies in my cafeteria…
I felt the weight in my thighs getting heavier.
I almost immediately felt a disgust for the body that I was in.
My appreciation for my body? Shattered.
The negative comments easily consumed my head and took over any nice comment I could have possibly received about my body. And that day I swallowed a big part of my self worth.
I became obsessive about food restriction and exercising. All I could think about was controlling my body and trying so hard not to put on any other weight. I was at the beach one day, extremely hungry and moody and refused to eat anything. I got into a fight with my friends because I didn’t want to eat any potato chips that they were all laughing and enjoying over. I never indulged in warm, delicious chocolate chip cookies again. I felt so ashamed and icky with my choices but I really didn’t think I had any other option.
I would stand in front of my bathroom mirror and feel immediate discomfort and disgust anytime I zipped up my pants. I despised my thighs and any fat that couldn’t be covered by my clothing.
You see, I tried to control this situation SO much that I ended up extremely unhappy and moody. Shedding the weight didn’t make me any happier with my body and how it felt. On top of this I felt highly irritated all the time (likely because of my food restrictions), insecure and was really afraid of getting any more comments about how I looked.
In the beginning of grad school I quickly discovered I had many more other health issues going on. One in particular– my crazy and unexplained acne on my forehead, really really bothered me. No amount of creams or other prescriptions were working for it and I almost gave up.
Until a friend of mine shared her positive experience about seeing a natropath to help cure her acne and how I should try it out, too.
I was hesitant at best, to try this out.
My acne at it’s worst state.
But considering that all of the pills and creams I was prescribed in the past weren’t working, I decided to give it a go.
As I sat in the waiting room for my first visit, the question “how committed are you to the treatments that the doctor may give you”. And something inside of me immediately wanted to circle 100%. So I did. And I went all in.
It took me a lot to trust in this process and to really invest in myself. But when I did, things finally started to change.
Working with a professional on my issues was both incredible and frustrating at the same time. I was told to work on areas of my life that I thought were totally unrelated to my appearance– my anxiety, stress, diet and digestive issues. I was also told at this time to add more yoga into my fitness routine, and to start practicing meditation to help reduce my anxiety and stress. And I was also given full permission to indulge in those cookies every once in a while. I finally started to understand the word balance.
And I got better.
A lot better…
My body felt stronger and my focus was clearer than ever. I had felt better overall then I had felt in nearly a decade. A miracle!
All because I trusted and took a leap of faith to get the help I so desperately needed.
These pictures were taken just a few months apart. And yes, I’m enjoying some chocolate covered bacon in London, with no shame!
And of course, lots of hard work, self discovery through yoga and meditation, refusing to play the victim and surrendering when I needed to.
Ironically, I also started to get more toned and finally got the body that I was always striving for.
And you know what beauty? Now I do the same for women like you…
Now, I help busy women go from feeling tired, anxious, stressed and unmotivated to being inspired, calm, physically & emotionally stronger, having more energy and feeling amazing in their bodies.
You CAN become motivated to step on your yoga mat every day, get strong & flexible, release any body shame you have and I am here to guide you through it.
And hey, I’m here to tell you that can do yoga, eat healthy AND eat those delicious cookies, I won’t judge you. And if you do it right, your body won’t judge, either.
Because I know that when you feel more calm, centered and confident in your mind and body, you’ll have much more energy left over to spend time doing things that REALLY matter to you.
When you do the work, you get the results. I’m here to hold you accountable and teach you through the work part…so that you get to reap the results.
You deserve to feel amazing in your body.